I think I made a HUGE mistake

Parental Alienation, Malicious Mother Syndrome, dealing with the ex, and various other non-legal concerns throughout the process.

I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby 504dad » Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:35 pm

As I mentioned previously in this forum, I had taken to audio-recording my S7 & S5 to collect information in regards to alienation. We had our custody modification trial on Monday and not only did it NOT go in my favour, I was sanctioned for audio-recording the children. The Court stated in its ruling that it felt as though by recording the children I was placing them squarely in the middle of the situation and emotionally harming them. So, instead of gaining custody of the children I am now required to endure Supervised < parenting time > for the next 3-months.

I don't believe that by audio-recording I was putting them in the middle, they did not even know about the recordings until Mother told them they were being recorded. I even went so far to file a Petition for Non-Disclosure that was granted by the Court. Mom violated that order and the Court didn't care.

Am I in the wrong here? The recordings were not coerced and the kids were not manipulated into saying various things. The Court's order stated that under normal circumstances the audio-recordings would not be an issue but because my son is ED (emotionally disability) that the knowledge of the recordings caused great turmoil for him and made him feel as if his trust/confidence had been violated.

Thoughts?
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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby jumbledone » Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:41 pm

Were you Pro Se?

Single party state or not? If it is a single party state, I think I'd be looking to appeal immediately.

Edit: Yup, pro se...
Last edited by jumbledone on Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby 504dad » Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:45 pm

Yes, I was Pro Se. We live in Arizona.



jumbledone wrote:Were you Pro Se?

Single party state or not? If it is a single party state, I think I'd be looking to appeal immediately.

Edit: Yup, pro se...
"Courage is resistance to fear; mastery of fear - not absence of fear."

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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby jumbledone » Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:48 pm

Based upon information you provided in the thread I linked before, this is a gross injustice. But going to court for a hearing without a lawyer is frowned upon around here.

If the verbiage from the judge is that you caused damage to your son because of recording him, I think a good legal mind can help you appeal, since recording is not illegal, and the only reason why there was damage to your son was because of 'looseness' on NJ's part.
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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby 504dad » Wed Jun 20, 2012 12:57 pm

I have ZERO money for an attorney. I'm a school teacher and the eX is financially backed by my FIL. As it is, I took out a loan for an attorney in year 2 - I cannot do that again since I had to short-sell my house. I have thrown myself on the mercy of a few attorney's and none are interested. Even if I filed an appeal, wouldn't this take months to sort anyway?

I received the Order this morning and already have my appointment with Family Services for the < parenting time > scheduled for this afternoon. We have been at this for going on 4-years - I'm exhausted.

I stated in court about Mom violating the Non-Disclosure and the Judge didn't bat an eye. In the CS hearing in October she refused to identify where her income comes from ($18K/mo) and no one cares. We're just supposed to believe her. If the Father refused to disclose $18K/mo you know he'd be in a Gulag rotting away until he disclosed every penny.

I feel as if the system helps to push Father's out of the children's lives....


jumbledone wrote:Based upon information you provided in the thread I linked before, this is a gross injustice. But going to court for a hearing without a lawyer is frowned upon around here.

If the verbiage from the judge is that you caused damage to your son because of recording him, I think a good legal mind can help you appeal, since recording is not illegal, and the only reason why there was damage to your son was because of 'looseness' on NJ's part.
"Courage is resistance to fear; mastery of fear - not absence of fear."

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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby jumbledone » Wed Jun 20, 2012 1:00 pm

It is, which is why we must fight twice as hard.

I know it sucks.
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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby Fatheroffour » Wed Jun 20, 2012 1:05 pm

I think you were doing the right thing for the right reasons but recording is trick business and recording kids is even more so. That's why the courts favor using GALS, custody evaluators and other professionals. Recording kids to be used as evidence leaves a bad taste in ones mouth and unless it's being done for criminal prosecution it's most likely not going to be looked on kindly regardless of the reasoning.

I'm sorry to read about the screwing you got in court.

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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby 504dad » Wed Jun 20, 2012 6:32 pm

Do any of you have experience with Supervised < parenting time >?

I had my 'intake' appointment today and it seems as though this is going to be traumatic for S7 who already has emotional difficulties. Apparently, S5, S7 and I just sit in a room for an hour a week and that's it. The Review Hearing is in September (seems like a lifetime away). Can I request to expedite the Review Hearing?

At the Review Hearing, do I stand a chance of regaining un-supervised visits since I will be following all of the rules?

Any insight would be appreciated.
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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby Fatheroffour » Wed Jun 20, 2012 6:35 pm

You should use the search function and take the time to read all of kidsdadtexas post.

It has a happy ending.
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Re: I think I made a HUGE mistake

Postby 504dad » Wed Jun 20, 2012 6:37 pm

Thank you... I am just kind of 'freaked out' about it.


Fatheroffour wrote:You should use the search function and take the time to read all of kidsdadtexas post.

It has a happy ending.
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