The family event is in another state, not sure I feel comfortable with that... Sure Grams and Gramps would be there, too, but their second cousins and such? Yeah, they see them once a year (not normally this weekend). And they can see Grams and Gramps the next weekend, or the weekend prior.
I'm going silent on this, and expecting the kids to spend that weekend with me. She'll need to bring it up again, and offer a fantastic deal for me to agree to 1: Giving up of 'special' time that overrides all other custody times, per the doc her lawyer wrote, 'special days' trump vacation, etc. 2: More than compensates the kids for the time they miss with me.
More I think about it, the appropriate answer is: Go pound sand.
Audaces fortuna iuvat.
The meaning of life is Happiness. What makes you happy? - Dalai Lama
For a more peaceful life, live the serenity prayer.