Hi, new here, and honestly, I am the finance of a divorced dad, and posting for information for him, because he isn't going to do it himself. So I apologize right off for that, but I wasn't sure where else would be better. I have been with him for a year an a half, he has been separated for two years, divorced 1. He has a 14 and 16yo boy, and a 18yo girl.
Last March, boys came to the house on his days (Sunday, Monday, Wednesday). they did this fine, very talkative with me and him. This lasted until June, when the divorce finalized and then summer started, but they came off and on, and we had them for half a week over the summer (ziplining and indoor skydiving, which they later told mom they hated), but starting in October they haven't come over at all.
She is another story entirely. She constantly goes away and leaves the kids with her sister or friends, despite him having ROFR, claiming that the kids hate it over with him and she won't do it to them. She doesn't update him about doctors or school, and whenever he stops by she is screaming at him. She has rearranged her work days and times so she is home when he is supposed to have the kids, and they won't leave her. He is currently paying child support and alimony though they have equal incomes, he is doing this because kids would have lost the house, and at the time he didn't want that. During the divorce hearing the judge asked him if he was aware that he was paying more than he needed to.
I am sure I need to add more details, but I guess my query is how much is rebellious teens, mom influencing the kids negatively, and at the age would he have any chance in getting custody if she really is negatively influencing them? Would court allow a renegogiatation of financial support based on the lack of communication if it will end up in her losing the house?
Currently, he just has all of her text messages saved. We live in CT, if that helps anything.
And again, I'll try to get him to post, but I don't know if he will. Currently, he is waiting to see if the 18yo will spend anytime with him before going back to college (so far it's a no). Any sites for the "step-mom support" would be great too. Mostly to help him.