Final payment coming soon....

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Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby nr552 » Wed Jan 03, 2018 3:32 pm

So I have been paying my EX via a stipulated agreement for child support arrears (which is done paid off) and a "peace settlement" amount of $$ that I offered her if she would quit fighting over parenting time. Basically I am paying her an extra $4150 to settle-- enjoy your new life. It's not considered spousal support, and there's no more child support (S16 lives with me, "hangs out with mom" when he wants to). I do not get CS from here, it's not worth the hassle.

I have run the numbers, and have it in a spreadsheet, and it appears that I will have her paid off 1/2 through March of this year.

The problem: She thinks I am paying her through the end of April. I have a journal of all payments (it comes direct from my payroll every 2 weeks), and according to the stipulated amount for each ($5500 for CS which includes a total of $500 in interest, and $4150 that we called "Legal Fees", or basically a non-taxable gift), middle of March I will be free from her financially.

The question: Do I notify her after the last payment (which will be only 2/3 of a normal bi-weekly payment)? Do I say nothing and let her scream/threaten? -- This is a woman that doesn't understand math very well... The stipulated payment of $750 per month, on a year schedule, paid bi-weekly works out to $346.16 every 2 weeks. She < female dog > and moans that I am "shorting her" each month. "Why am I not getting $375 a payment??!?" -- I did the whole math routine for her ($750 month x 12 months = $9000 (I had previously paid the $650 of the $9650 total owed), 52 weeks in a year = $173.076 a week, I get paid "bi-weekly" so $173.076 x 2 = $346.16 (I rounded up)... which is what she gets.

Just trying to cover myself, and not have to go back to court over $500 or less worth of BS.

Thanks.
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby dad2grls » Wed Jan 03, 2018 5:37 pm

You KNOW she's going to go ballistic if you short her on that last payment.

So why are you asking US how we would expect a woman to react that we don't know nearly as well as you do?

My advice>? Pay her the whole amount, what is it a few hundred bucks? And be done with it rather than risk her dragging you back through the legal system just because she thinks you're not being fair.
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby dadforever » Wed Jan 03, 2018 6:05 pm

Pay the last payment then file for child support. What do you mean it's not worth the hassle? That sounds like a cop out.

Edit to add- actually I wouldn't pay more than you owe. If she doesn't like too bad so sad. But still file for child support.
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby TJinCA » Wed Jan 03, 2018 6:12 pm

I think I agree that it's probably best to just make full payments through March, just to avoid hassle.

I think I'd stop the direct deposit before the last payment. Send her a check for the last installment marked "Final Payment" in the memo field, and enclose a copy of your spreadsheet that shows that she's been paid in full (stronger still if it shows that you overpaid her somewhat for March).

If she gripes about taking you to court, remind her that you have documentation that she's been paid more than she was owed. So in court you'll look to recover the overpayment, plus (since her suit is frivolous) you'll ask the court to order her to cover your legal fees (you may or may not have a legal basis for recovering fees, but it can't hurt to bluff).
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby HaltAndCatchFire » Wed Jan 03, 2018 6:34 pm

What she thinks is irrelevant, it's what you can prove if she files a motion. How bulletproof are the assurances you can provide that spousal support has been paid according to the stipulation? Can you provide certified records that she received all spousal support? If yes, then pay her what she is owed and no more. If not, then what steps have you taken to address any claims from her that previous payments to her were "gifts"?
The only way out is through.
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby ib536 » Thu Jan 04, 2018 10:06 am

TJinCA wrote:Send her a check for the last installment marked "Final Payment" in the memo field, and enclose a copy of your spreadsheet that shows that she's been paid in full (stronger still if it shows that you overpaid her somewhat for March).

There is actual case law that supports this idea, but it is geared more toward commercial contracts under Uniform Commercial Code (UCC). Here is an actual case with the Appellate ruling:
https://www.leagle.com/decision/1987479202conn2771458

"The defendant maintains that, when the plaintiff knowingly cashed a check explicitly tendered in full satisfaction of an unliquidated debt, the plaintiff became bound by the terms of settlement that the check contained."

Instead of "Final Payment" though, the wording needs to be "payment in full" or "in full satisfaction".
I learned about this from my Business Law class in college back in the early 90's, and have put this to actual use. Since this is not really CS or SS, then you're essentially under a contract with her based on an agreement. This could apply. With it being a "direct from payroll" situation, I'm not sure you could do it.

Bottom line, if you add the verbage to a check, and the other party cashes the check, then they have effectively accepted your change to the contract. Done deal.

ETA: the book I got this idea from originally is: "Business Law: Principles, Cases, and Policy" by Mark Roszkowski, Third Edition (1992) pg. 203
Last edited by ib536 on Thu Jan 04, 2018 3:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby ScaredNConfused » Thu Jan 04, 2018 1:33 pm

Do a cost / benefit analysis both from financial and from your health points of view.

Is your ex going to take you to court, file a motion, or otherwise spend money on anything legal related?
If so, likely a little extra will be far less even if you are proven "right"

How much mental / emotional energy on you going to spend on this?
For a little extra money, is it worth it?

I know I'd have a hard time right now myself since my ex keeps ignoring the permanent orders and does what she wants, but try to be objective.
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby nr552 » Thu Jan 04, 2018 2:14 pm

dad2grls wrote:You KNOW she's going to go ballistic if you short her on that last payment.

So why are you asking US how we would expect a woman to react that we don't know nearly as well as you do?

My advice>? Pay her the whole amount, what is it a few hundred bucks? And be done with it rather than risk her dragging you back through the legal system just because she thinks you're not being fair.


I had to re-read my post and compare to my numbers-- in actuality "She thinks I am paying her through the end of April"
it comes out to over $1k additional she thinks she'll get going through the END of April, pushing my total payout to nearly double my original CS that was in arrears + interest.

Our S16 lives with me 86% on paper, more like 95% in actual practice. The $$$.$$ I pay her goes to her and her boyfriend (neither of whom work), not to our S16. Our S16 has gotten into trouble in school off and on since middle school, now there's pot and Xanax involved-- $hitty friends @ school, peer pressure, who knows. I have him in counseling now, including a drug treatment program (that I will be attending with him, but in the "parenting part" of the program-- mom is a no show as usual). I just paid off his braces, and I cover 100% of all costs for him (broke his school supplied laptop-- instead of forking out the $$$ to get a replacement, I took his a part, discovered what parts were broke and was able to source the parts and repair the entire thing myself for less than $60.

I really feel no obligation to pay her a dime more than the order. She can take me to court over it, I have all the documentation for it. I wanted to know if there was any "legal" notification I need to give her. I like idea, and had intended to stop the last direct deposit, then mail her a check for the current payment + the LAST payment with a "payment in full" written on the memo line of the check (registered mail, signature required, etc).

Thanks for the feedback guys, I appreciate it.
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby dad2grls » Thu Jan 04, 2018 3:44 pm

With the last check marked "paid in full'" enclose an explanation that is as clear and simple as possible, hopefully she'll either surprise you by understanding it or else she'll at least realize it's not worth taking you to court over it.

Try to use an overall pleasant tone, to the effect of "it's been a pleasure doing business with you, good bye and good luck".
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Re: Final payment coming soon....

Unread postby Trevor » Thu Jan 04, 2018 4:10 pm

I'll underscore the value of TJ's suggestion to enclose a simple spreadsheet of payment dates, amounts, and (if appropriate) diminishing balance at each entry.
"Personal density is directly proportional to temporal bandwidth."
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