I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor $

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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby regret143 » Mon Oct 09, 2017 11:24 am

Trevor wrote:I stand corrected. viewtopic.php?f=7&t=74091&p=813853#p813853

You've been told about all this stuff and failed to execute it back then. Almost 2 years ago.

How many times do you need to be told something before you bother to act upon it?


Depression took the best of me. Being hit on 2 major fronts, while being recently relocated away from any family or friend is not easy. I know I have failed, and ultimately I'm a victim of it.

Yes, I feel extorted because she is trying to get from me 3 times more than is fair.

Also, I already have a payment plan arranged with the AG's office, I'm paying $150 extra every month for that. I have never refused to pay or tried to get away with it, I'm actually paying more than I can afford.
I just want to pay and be payed what was decided in court.
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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby Trevor » Mon Oct 09, 2017 11:53 am

regret143 wrote:Yes, I feel extorted because she is trying to get from me 3 times more than is fair.

Your use of the term "extorted" betrays a victim mentality. This is something you need to fix immediately. She can ask for anything she wants, including your involuntary sterilization. Doesn't mean she is going to get it.

Much healthier to laugh off her ridiculous starting points, understand what is the correct math, and understand that the court has already spoken on the issue at hand - you have orders.

Her path almost certainly would be through mediation, and you don't need a lawyer for that. You can also ask for her to pay all mediation costs - since she's the one who seeks a change. And then she will think twice about the viability of her offer, knowing she would have to back up her inflated financial claims with documentation.

She knows you are peeing in your pants right now; this is the biggest problem. She smells the fear you have for her. And she loves it.

regret143 wrote:I already have a payment plan arranged with the AG's office...I'm actually paying more than I can afford. I just want to pay and be payed what was decided in court.

But this payment plan includes amounts set with your previous earnings (as you say you're going to file for a mod soon)? Plus $150 for the arrears until it's paid down?

Do the homework I suggested. Then report back what you learn from the CS Agency.

Again, the court has spoken on this and you have every right to ignore what she is saying. But you have to take actionable steps. Today.
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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby jumanji » Fri Oct 13, 2017 12:28 pm

How much interest is accruing on the CS that you owe?
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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby Trevor » Fri Oct 13, 2017 3:38 pm

He's taking many days to do his homework on the CS Agency, jujube, so don't hold your breath for an answer.
"Personal density is directly proportional to temporal bandwidth."
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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby dad2grls » Wed Nov 22, 2017 3:38 pm

Trevor wrote:I stand corrected. viewtopic.php?f=7&t=74091&p=813853#p813853

You've been told about all this stuff and failed to execute it back then. Almost 2 years ago.

How many times do you need to be told something before you bother to act upon it?


He already stated multiple times that he's an idiot.

In which case he has told be told to do something a lot more than once.
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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby regret143 » Sat Feb 17, 2018 11:00 am

Update:

I got a lawyer and decided not to give in anymore. Told my lawyer to negotiate only what would be fair to me, and if they continue their insane claims, to stop it and let it go to court.
Apparently in my county the judge won't see the case before you go to mediation, so there we went. I walked in the mediator's office with debt past due of 8k, and 35k owed to me due in 2 years, or net total of 27k (not considering eventual penalties and OC fees). After 6 hours of mediation, I walked out with: zero debt, and a credit torwards CS of 30k, and a reduction of $150 of the child support amount (meaning an extra year not paying CS). No penalties, no OC fees, case done. Having spent only $1400 on my lawyer.
That night, I took my GF out to dinner, I had something to celebrate!
I practiced something I knew, but was unable to do before. Stand your ground, don't bend over. Fight back.
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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby BartSimpson » Sat Feb 17, 2018 12:38 pm

Thanks for the update, and good job in hiring counsel to get this over with properly.

$1400 to save how much?
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Re: I'm being extorted by ex. I owe back CS and a few minor

Unread postby SoxFan1986 » Sun Feb 18, 2018 7:01 pm

regret143 wrote:Update:

I walked out with: zero debt, and a credit torwards CS of 30k, and a reduction of $150 of the child support amount (meaning an extra year not paying CS). No penalties, no OC fees, case done. Having spent only $1400 on my lawyer.
That night, I took my GF out to dinner, I had something to celebrate!
I practiced something I knew, but was unable to do before. Stand your ground, don't bend over. Fight back.


thanks for the update...we can offer a lot of good advise and strategy on this site but your case had a lot of moving parts. Glad you hired an attorney and he got the job done. Sounds like a good deal.

Moving forward, try to stay proactive on the daycare and medical bills. I use the rule of thumb, pay the provider directly if possible. If there's a balance at the doctors office, go there and pay your half directly. Take the kids to half of the appointments..When my daughter was in daycare, they let the parents split the cost.
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