How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married?

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How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married?

Unread postby MarcoPoloDad » Tue Sep 26, 2017 4:51 pm

Greeting Gentlemen,

I suspect my ex may be remarried, in which case my alimony payments may be terminated. I would like to know, how I should go about it and whether there is any benefit to try to terminate the alimony, if I run the cost benefit analysis.

I have 5 more months of alimony to pay before reaching the termination date which equated to $15,000.

The source of this information is the "marriage application" filed around a month ago with the county where ex lives.

Your thoughts is greatly appreciated.

M.
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby lovingfatherof2 » Tue Sep 26, 2017 4:59 pm

You should be able to get the marriage license or something of that nature, each state is different on what is public, that is about all you need for evidence.

I wouldn't hire a lawyer with only 5 months left but if it were me I would try it myself pro se. Would be kinda fun and no real down side. Worse case you lose but it's only 5 months.
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby Outis » Tue Sep 26, 2017 6:04 pm

How far apart do you and the ex live? Since your name implies you're a dad, how are things with the kid(s) post-divorce?
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby TJinCA » Tue Sep 26, 2017 6:15 pm

Well, I don't know your ex and you do, but it seems to me it would be pretty foolish of her to get married with 5 months left to go on spousal support. More likely wedding bells will be the week after support ends.

Definitely not worth a lawyer, that would probably eat up a big chunk of the $15K. Might be worth pursuing on your own, if you think you can get documentation of the marriage (that it occurred, not just that an application was submitted) from the county and if you don't think she'll lawyer up in response. Even if she's been cohabitating with her fiancé for a while and you're due some relief for that, you can probably only recover back to the date you file for the modification.

If it were me just based on what you've said, I think I'd leave it alone.
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby Outis » Tue Sep 26, 2017 10:24 pm

Well said, TJ.

Btw, bit smokey lately. You good?
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby Tom Kirkpatrick » Tue Sep 26, 2017 10:31 pm

MarcoPoloDad wrote:Greeting Gentlemen,

I suspect my ex may be remarried, in which case my alimony payments may be terminated. I would like to know, how I should go about it and whether there is any benefit to try to terminate the alimony, if I run the cost benefit analysis.

I have 5 more months of alimony to pay before reaching the termination date which equated to $15,000.

The source of this information is the "marriage application" filed around a month ago with the county where ex lives.

Your thoughts is greatly appreciated.

M.
1) Do a cost-benefit analysis, Bro.
2) As long as you've got a termination date certain in the near future, I wouldn't worry about it.

With only five months remaining on alimony, it's probably not worth your time and trouble to hire an attorney and to go to court. Besides, it'll be many months before you see a family court judge.

Tom
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby MarcoPoloDad » Wed Sep 27, 2017 12:47 pm

Gentlemen,

Thanks to those who stayed on the topic and shared their wisdom.

I called and spoke with two attorneys and the following is what I was told:

Attorney #1: It is stated in your final decree that the support will be terminated, if ex gets married. Therefore, keep checking the online county's public record until a record of "Marriage Certificate" pops up. Once the marriage certificate is recorded, send ex a wedding congratulation card or even add a box of chocolate to the shipment and congratulate her and wish her all well. Once that is done, stop sending her the alimony checks. For now that the marriage certificate has not been recorded, you need to sit tight and send her the checks. No need to hire an attorney. You simply follow your court's order.

Attorney #2: Let's make an appointment and discuss the matter.

I would appreciate hearing your opinion on this.

M.
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby Tom Kirkpatrick » Wed Sep 27, 2017 2:29 pm

Attorney #1 is is wrong. If your ex gets married, it still takes a court order to terminate alimony. You just can't stop sending her checks without due process.

Attorney #2 just wants your money. " Make an appointment with my secretary and we can talk about it." This guy doesn't give free advice.

Tom
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby TJinCA » Wed Sep 27, 2017 3:12 pm

I think Attorney #1 is right--if your current decree says that support is terminated upon remarriage of the receiver, then you already have a valid court order which terminates support once the marriage has occurred and you can just stop paying. I don't think you need another one. State law may also state that spousal support terminates on remarriage of the receiving spouse (for example, CA Family Code says it does unless the parties have specifically agreed in writing otherwise).

I do agree with Tom about Attorney #2.
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Re: How shouled I go about ex either getting or been married

Unread postby MarcoPoloDad » Wed Sep 27, 2017 5:36 pm

Gentlemen,

Thank you for stepping in and sharing your wisdom.

I called few more attorneys and spent sometimes online searching and even got intimidate with RCW 26.09.170 (Modification of decree for maintenance or support, property disposition—Termination of maintenance obligation and child support—Grounds.) which states:

(2) Unless otherwise agreed in writing or expressly provided in the decree the obligation to pay future maintenance is terminated upon the death of either party or the remarriage of the party receiving maintenance or registration of a new domestic partnership of the party receiving maintenance.

The wording of my decree is: The maintenance obligation shall be non-modifiable except that upon the death or remarriage of the wife, maintenance shall terminate.

Which implies, I can stop the payment on her remarriage.

I called few other attorneys who provided a range of responses between what I have already shared earlier. One attorney spent more time on the phone and I think he nailed it. For the sake of posting I call him Attorney #3.

Attorney #3: Once you stop paying, your ex may (most probably will) file motion with the court for nonpayment - show cause. Then you need to present her marriage license in your response. To save you the trouble, you will be better off to notify your ex that she is remarried and you will stop the alimony payments base on your court's order, once the marriage certificate pops up on the county's online public record.

Feel free to share your wisdom on this.

M.
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