When married, my ex was in charge of the finances and charge she did. When I asked to take over the finances, I was told: "over my dead body." Her spending was far, far beyond our means and resulted in great financial stress for years to come for both of us after divorce.
Fast forward 20 years, I own my home, 7 cars, paid off hundreds of thousands of debt, have no debt today whatsoever and a FICO of 810+. I'm at the point if I use a credit card, I pay it online when I get home so when my head hits the pillow, I'm debt free every day.
The problem is my GF wants to take over "our" finances if we move in together. I'm fine with allocating bills according to income, then taking care of our own incomes, but I'm not willing to hand my finances over to someone else, nor do I need to control hers. As it is, she would move into my home and have no rent to pay, thus have far more expendable income for herself which is fine with me, but I'm not handing control of my own financial future to someone else.
This seems to be a deal breaker for her, which spells an end to our relationship.
Is this kind of thinking all that common from either gender of needing to control the household finances?
“There are those that look at things the way they are, and ask why? I dream of things that never were, and ask why not?”