If you are all that concerned about what others think of you, you probably need some bigger problems.
As I said, I was afraid she would accuse me of being controlling and of demeaning her.
She accused me of those things anyway, then she cheated (at least emotionally) on me, then she filed anyway, despite my efforts over four months to save our marriage.
So yep, what I did was not at all helpful, but hindsight is always 20/20, no doubt.
Whenever you think divorce is bad, remember there are worse things than divorce.