Will I still lose custody?

Parental Alienation, Malicious Mother Syndrome, dealing with the ex, and various other non-legal concerns throughout the process.

Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby Tom Kirkpatrick » Sun Apr 16, 2017 8:36 pm

pharoeandisis wrote:My ex-spouse wants full custody and 4 times the child support.
Have you crunched numbers in your state's child support calculator?? Before completely wigging out, you should be doing that.

What's your state?? Colorado??

Tom
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby kirkpatrick » Mon Apr 17, 2017 12:58 am

Time to throw a block party. Your NJX is playing, "It's just us three girls game.." In other words she's pretending to be young again. Your daughters are sexually active!!! They know that you will not allow them to have every Tom, and Hairy < edited > over for a sleep over. However, Mom Will!!!! After all Mom has to teach the girls how to hunt men!! Your a Male so you are definitely not welcome to this shindig..As a consequence you are uncool..

You need to crank up your IDGS meter and change your image. Buy a Harley and find a YOUNG HOT Biker Babe!! ( Don't forget the Viagra!!) Leave a few opened condom packs laying around the house..Make sure both your daughters meet your New GF. She should put their menstruation cycle back on track. After all they will cycle in with the dominate female of the household.

Next order of business, is to take them to a ROCK CONCERT... Yes bring along YHBB. Your goal is to show them your coolness. After all they wouldn't want to miss out by staying over with the Old Grey Mare.. Shortly after this I would hold a all Girls sleep over.. Your New YHBB can manage this. Not to mention will get all the low down on your ex..

Jr.
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby Fatheroffour » Mon Apr 17, 2017 5:49 am

^^^^Wow, such stunningly horrible advice is pretty rare around here.
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby MegaDad » Mon Apr 17, 2017 8:26 am

That was a joke right?
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby grandetaco » Mon Apr 17, 2017 9:32 am

Fatheroffour wrote:^^^^Wow, such stunningly horrible advice is pretty rare around here.


Lol, the shock route,
I will offer a twist, OP are predictable, NJ has been poisoning these young minds, you Sir need to up the ante, you have ask yourself what you are willing to do for them?

What KP is saying to redefine your image to the girls and negate image created by nj.

Remember, you will ZERO influence if you don't talk to your girls and don't get to see them. To beat nj one must elate oneself to Samurai nj!

1. Custody Evaluator: Be honest, that you were frustrated at Ds action, you want the best for your Ds and express your parenting concerns. Make you tell how sorry you are that you were frustrated. Ask for guidance on how to proceed to co-parent successfully avoid conflict.
Make sure you keep screen shots of the text sent in by D asking you to sign. Present said text to the CE person, ask if D should be involved in such negotiation by mother?

2. You lost and nj won when you lost your temper, ask how I know? nj spends every hour of the day brain washing these young minds, when they speak it is not them, it is nj. You have to have a game plan to do things, say things to reinforce your bond with them and seed ideas which negate what nj feeds them.
Take them out to a rock concert, go get your nails done with them.

First and foremost reach out to your Ds, Say how much you love them and say sorry for your actions. You have to not only mend but rebuild the bridge. It won't happen overnight, you need to be persistent.

Read what Tom posted, you should use it to go for more custody, yes, what nj is doing to the girls and damaging to them. She is putting them in the middle and not fostering love for both parents. nj is berating you to the girls.
Come up with a coherent story and work with your atty to come up with a motion.

Also include motion for reunification therapy for both girls and you.
Also include make up time..
Go on the offensive bro, you owe it to the Ds.
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby pharoeandisis » Mon Apr 17, 2017 11:55 am

Most people have the same or similar reaction when they see the text from my D14. It's evident that mom is sharing details of the custody with kids. Prior to this text message, the kids would call me asking for more Child Support. I did manage to confirm that my D14 wrote the text and not by my ex-wife. But she was probably coached.

There's absolutely no excuse for grabbing my D16 by the arm to remove her from the car. However, my ex-wife is attempting to benefit of this situation. It's unfortunate, that my ex-wife has been training my D16 for years to alienate people that love her the most. My ex-wife has also alienated her own mother. They haven't seen each other for 10 years.

Today I'll meet with the Child Family Investigator for the first time. Even if he sees that my ex-wife is engaging in Parental Alienation in an attempt to punish me with and enabling my daughters to stay with her and thus, attempting to capitalize on more Child Support; I am not very optimistic that I'll get any parenting time. I really believe that my ex-wife has been manipulating and poisoning my kids for years in an attempt to alienate loving family members including myself.

My ex-wife told me that she was sexually abused as a child by her father and other males friends of her father. It seems like she's punishing me for what went wrong in her childhood and she is now making sure the next generation will do the same. Some professionals I've talked to thinks my ex-wife suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder.

I wouldn't be surprise if she attempts to charm the CFI and doesn't report her sexual abuse from her childhood on the CFI's in-take questionnaire.

Will anybody see that it's not in the "best interest" of my daughters to stay with my ex-wife? Even if the CFI report indicates my ex-wife is psychologically harmful to my kids, will the courts deny me 50/50 custody (per the original divorce decree)? I'm fearful that the courts will only hear my kids desire to stay with their mother. I'm fearful she has a very tight grip on them, just like a cult leader has on their followers? To me and other people I've spoken to, e.g., Parental Alienation support group and other mental health professionals say this is very similar to the Stockholm Syndrome. Essentially, my ex-wife is holding my kids hostage and my ex-wife is attempting to get 100% custody and a lot more child support.

I think I have a good case, but will the courts care? Will the courts see that my ex-wife is a bad influence on my daughters and there may be long-term psychological effects on my daughters for years to come. As their father, I want to protect them, but I really screwed myself for not knowing more about Parental Alienation and what my ex-wife is capable of doing. Also I screwed myself with losing my temper with D16 and grabbing her by the arm.

Thank you all for your comments. This is a very painful situation for myself, my ex-wife's mother, my father, my brother and friends.

I will keep this post alive when more details become available. I hope someone will learn from my mistakes and benefit from my experiences of how I'm handling this messy situation.
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby massdad1234 » Mon Apr 17, 2017 8:46 pm

What about the kid your grabbed? :shock:

pharoeandisis wrote:This is a very painful situation for myself, my ex-wife's mother, my father, my brother and friends.
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby grandetaco » Tue Apr 18, 2017 9:01 am

You have to put the girls first, it is emotionally challenging but put yourself in their shoes, think of the stress and pressure they are under daily from the crazy abusive nj. You have to be the rock for them and be patient.

Wake up bro, it is your JOB to show the court what is going on, it your job to make the court care. You have to construct your case in a such a way to imply that the courts judicial record is going to be tainted if the court agrees in any form to anything that nj asks for.

Again, make the girls best interest the center of your case, your pleadings show demonstrate how concerned you are and how helpless you feel. Make sure you fess up to the incident and explain it away (consult atty for strategy on this). It is always better to play the OC's hand first. In your case talking about the arm grabbing incident.

How will you explain away the arm grabbing incident? what have you done to ensure that it will not happen again? How about your D, did you reach out to her and make mends?
Last edited by grandetaco on Tue Apr 18, 2017 10:02 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby Chasbo » Tue Apr 18, 2017 9:57 am

If I was a judge and I saw the email your daughter wrote. I would award you sole custody. It's so obviously coached.

To me it would be so clear what is going on.

On the other hand, I teach my kids personal responsibility. At 16 and 14 they have to take some responsibility for their actions. Parental love is not just a one way street.

As for grabbing her arm. Big deal. It's making a mountain of a molehill. Apologize and move on. If they can't /won't then that is more like their issue. Kids need boundaries and that includes being reasonable and understanding you are human too.
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Re: Will I still lose custody?

Unread postby Chasbo » Tue Apr 18, 2017 10:05 am

As for making yourself the fun dad.

I actually agree with that advice. Not in the demented way posted above. Bringing random sluts around is definitely not the answer.

I drive my kids around in a convertible ( embarrassing and fun for them)projector movies, interesting controversial discussions, play sports together, paintball, etc. Stuff I enjoy and they like.
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