Ex is refusing to pay for daycare since alimony ended

Parental Alienation, Malicious Mother Syndrome, dealing with the ex, and various other non-legal concerns throughout the process.

Ex is refusing to pay for daycare since alimony ended

Unread postby TOC » Fri Mar 17, 2017 3:48 pm

So my ex is refusing to pay her share for daycare since she claims she "can't spend what she doesn't have."

What is my recourse here? I can't afford paying 100% of childcare...do I just pay my share (direct to the daycare like I always do)? I can't imagine that working since the daycare won't be receiving the full amount and will then cancel my son's registration.

Do I just pay for daily childcare (ie babysitter) for the days I have parenting time?

It's just very interesting she's using alimony ending as the scapegoat here...
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Re: Ex is refusing to pay for daycare since alimony ended

Unread postby BartSimpson » Fri Mar 17, 2017 4:09 pm

I'd start with an R3 letter - you've been around, do you remember what that involves?
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Re: Ex is refusing to pay for daycare since alimony ended

Unread postby lovingfatherof2 » Fri Mar 17, 2017 4:33 pm

This is why I prefer paying for child care through the state.

If she stops paying her share and the kids can no longer go to childcare I just file a motion to have child support recalculated.
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Re: Ex is refusing to pay for daycare since alimony ended

Unread postby TOC » Sat Mar 18, 2017 4:46 pm

Appreciate the replies.

I am familiar with the R3, although I do not believe I ever had to resort to it. My understanding is to word it as if a judge was reading it, correct?

Shall I simply reference the section of the divorce decree that makes mention of each parent's share of work-related child care? And in the meantime, do I pay 100% of the cost until this is straightened out, possibly with the help of the Courts?

And as for paying directly through the state, I'm not sure my state allows that but I will look into it and then see if child support can be adjusted accordingly if I am paying total cost of childcare.
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Re: Ex is refusing to pay for daycare since alimony ended

Unread postby Tom Kirkpatrick » Sun Mar 19, 2017 12:10 pm

When writing an R-3, use the BIFF rule: brief, informative, friendly and firm. Here's a couple of links:

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=77676&start=10

viewtopic.php?f=8&t=77676&start=10

TOC wrote:And as for paying directly through the state, I'm not sure my state allows that but I will look into it and then see if child support can be adjusted accordingly if I am paying total cost of childcare.
When it comes to NJ refusing to pay for daycare, you may need to think in terms of "child support deviation." Moreover, you may want Support Enforcement collecting that child support so you won't hafta deal with her.

Tom
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Re: Ex is refusing to pay for daycare since alimony ended

Unread postby TOC » Mon Mar 20, 2017 9:02 am

Great information, thank you.
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