advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Parental Alienation, Malicious Mother Syndrome, dealing with the ex, and various other non-legal concerns throughout the process.

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby BrilliantBastard » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:30 pm

Teens make really bad decisions, its what they do. Schools and social situations are really tough at this age. There was always drama back when I was this age, and back then it was over after 7 hours. Now with social media it is non stop. I would not allow it, tell her you will reconsider in a year, which you give you time to figure out what is going on, or for the situation to fix itself.
User avatar
BrilliantBastard
500+ Posts
 
Posts: 728
Joined: Thu Nov 12, 2015 8:53 am

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby afc » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:34 pm

So you'd let her be subjected to a year of being called s lut, < female dog > and getting threatened with a beat down just so you feel better about it?

Because that's what it could be. Would you go into work to an atmosphere like that? How well do you think you could work with that going on?

How much do you think this kid will learn if the bullying is that bad?
afc
5K+ Posts
 
Posts: 7492
Joined: Wed Nov 06, 2013 4:22 pm

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby JimRockford » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:39 pm

I agree that college is not for everyone, but bonehead school for underachievers should be for no one.
Deciding to go forward with a divorce is kind of like joining a brotherhood. However, it is a brotherhood that you really don't want to join.
JimRockford
500+ Posts
 
Posts: 946
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2015 12:48 am

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby ThroughTheNever » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:42 pm

@afc I offered to put her in another school. If she was at least honest a little bit about what happened I would not have a problem. I'm not an iron fist dad, if the school was really that bad I would not having a problem doing this, the fact that she want's to give up with no reason frustrates me. I want to try and get her to learn from this. She has three other schools we can get her into to quickly. She stays up late and sleeps in and has about three hours of homework a week now. I just don't understand how that's going to prepare her for life. Maybe its best she get a part time job and try and graduate early if possible.
ThroughTheNever
50+ Posts
 
Posts: 91
Joined: Thu Mar 14, 2013 2:01 am

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby ThroughTheNever » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:48 pm

@Jim we did get her enrolled into a highly recommended independent study for next year, but right now its bone head. I'm thinking of signing her up for a least music lessons or something. I also need to get her sleeping schedule worked out. She is really hard to deal with right now.
ThroughTheNever
50+ Posts
 
Posts: 91
Joined: Thu Mar 14, 2013 2:01 am

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby afc » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:50 pm

Maybe the work study is the best option. A job can do a lot for a kid.
afc
5K+ Posts
 
Posts: 7492
Joined: Wed Nov 06, 2013 4:22 pm

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby Fatheroffour » Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:11 pm

I think the bigger issue is that she won't talk to you about it.

What are your thoughts on that?
User avatar
Fatheroffour
Moderator
 
Posts: 36482
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:37 am
Location: Top of the world

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby ThroughTheNever » Fri Mar 17, 2017 7:29 pm

@fatheroffour

Good point, she mentioned issues with other girls the first time she tried this, it got worked out and she went back to school. This time it depression, she wont tell her mom either. She says she hates school but no specific details, the fact that she won't say anything specific really gets at me because I told her I don't need details. Her cousin did the same thing, switched schools and then almost dropped out, and when we put her in this small school, in the back of my mind I thought this was going to happen. The mom just caved in and is totally ok with this. She gossips a lot like her mom and the women in that family have issues getting along with other women. I guess the positive thing is she is seeing a counselor.
ThroughTheNever
50+ Posts
 
Posts: 91
Joined: Thu Mar 14, 2013 2:01 am

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby RockyCali » Mon Mar 20, 2017 4:55 pm

ThroughTheNever wrote:... If she was at least honest a little bit about what happened ...

Sorry but this part really rubbed me the wrong way.

You're her dad. You know what's going on. Protect her. Do what's right for her. Months or years from now she will remember Superdad who did what was right for her when she was too scared to admit it -- even though all present knew it was happening.
User avatar
RockyCali
100+ Posts
 
Posts: 288
Joined: Mon May 12, 2014 3:22 pm

Re: advice - 15 year old daughter went on independent study

Unread postby ThroughTheNever » Wed Mar 22, 2017 8:09 pm

@RockyCali

The issue is I'm not sure what happened, I can sit and spin my wheels and guess until she tells me. I did not prevent her from starting independent study, which she has started - and she is now in counseling. She wants to get a job at McDonald's and has an interview this Friday. For the most part our relationship has been ok and she has not gotten into a lot of trouble at school.

I guess I'm struggling because I don't want her to end up like her mom, she is mimicking a lot of behavior of her mom lately. Her mom still does not really work and has a < feces-like > attitude. I know I need to let that go and reboot. It's a struggle.
ThroughTheNever
50+ Posts
 
Posts: 91
Joined: Thu Mar 14, 2013 2:01 am

PreviousNext

Return to Parenting - Child Custody Forum and Child Support Forum

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: colodad76, steelmark and 10 guests