Op, this is hard top, emotionally hard.
You are fighting nj's poisoning and it is not your child who is refusing to speak go you, it is nj's constant barrage of hate speech she throws at D.
Keep sending messages to D, start by apologizing, tell her how much you love her, how much you miss taking to her. How are you looking forward to moving closer to them.
Do you best to build, rebuild the bridge.
Then, you must strategize to defeat nj at her own game, you must elate yourself to Samurai-nj.
yeah go get some fake eye brows put em on and send it to your D, asking her if you look pretty.
No, seriously, you have to keep pounding it to both children and they need to love both parents. You need to cast doubt into what nj feeds her daily, hourly. You do this by seeding thoughts and ideas. Statements like, you guys need to love your mother dearly and I will never tell you think otherwise.
You need to add to that very gently that anyone who says little girls should not love their fathers is just wrong, just evil. Do this without ever mentioning nj in any form.
This will not be a one day, one week, even one month thing, it took me 1.5 years to turn my child around somewhat and it is a daily battle to keep nj's programming out their heads.
“A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband, while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.”