dss_pansat wrote:I think she has right to let the kids stay with grandparent because it's her time. One time my lawyer told me that if I'm going out of town for business, I must find someone to take care the kids either relatives or friends if she does not want to keep the kids because it's my time.
Yes, exactly. She has the right to put the kids with her parents, during her time, whenever she wants. I would rather that she HAVE to offer that time to me first. Currently, our agreement doesn't provide for that, but I want it to. I'm looking for strategies or advice about how to make that happen. The most obvious is to get a Right of First Refusal into our current mediated agreement. She's currently not open to that because she says it would take time away from her parents. I believe that time with me (and with her) should be the priority in our agreement. I think the court would agree with me if it came to that, but I'm not interested in taking it to court if I can strategize to get her to agree to it in mediation. I think I can be successful with that if I just have enough, frankly, legal sounding arguments behind my point.
One tact I've considered is telling her that her insistence that her parents' home is like "another home" to the kids shows the court just how much she has kept them from their father when I've been available. I want to imply that the hours they spend at the grandparents during her time is actually a bad thing in the eyes of the court. She travels, fine. But I'm available during that time. I want the kids to be with me for the bulk of those overnights (I have no problem with the kids staying at Grandma's once or twice a month; they are over there way more than that). Grandparents are fine, but they are not parents. AND, the kids don't get their homework done over there; they watch TV and play video games. And so on.
So again, any arguments, persuasion, strategies that could help me win ROFR in mediation, and then in court if necessary would be appreciated. Thanks!