Which are Father-friendly states?

Parental Alienation, Malicious Mother Syndrome, dealing with the ex, and various other non-legal concerns throughout the process.

Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby adhoc » Fri Jan 08, 2010 1:56 am

Maryland does not appear to be one of them.
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby teddy » Fri Jan 08, 2010 6:22 am

Not sure that there are any, per se. It appears to me that it is more dependent on the local judge(s). I'm in a conservative part of Texas (which, by the way, is moving more and more to an equal parenting stance), and have seen some horrible injustices in area courtrooms. My county, on the other hand, has a judge that is not biased towards either parent; rather, he really takes the kids best interest to heart.
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby jeremys » Fri Jan 08, 2010 7:21 am

WA claims to be but like teddy said it all depends on local Judges
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby Jehr » Fri Jan 08, 2010 7:33 am

I can't complain about how the process in GA went for me. But then again, I found this site months ahead of time and was always ahead of my idiot ex, and was able to shape the playing field.
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby Thoughts? » Fri Jan 08, 2010 3:40 pm

To Teddy's comment, it's difficult to comp for a garbage judge. MD is a nightmare, with age-old blue laws, and a liberal legislature, so I agree with your assessment. TX is anti-alimony, is true (as in enforceable) joint legal, has generous default extended standard parenting, but it's child support model is out of the Midwest in the 70's. Literally, it's built upon the old WI model that assumed dads as checkbooks as the base line.
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby nuke » Sun Jan 10, 2010 12:32 pm

I think Iowa can be fairly father-friendly. With shared parenting as the model - judges are required by law to explain in their orders why shared parenting was not ordered. And the appeals courts decided that not being able to get along is NOT a reason - and that if the reason is that the parties cannot communicate then the person who is the obstacle is presumed to NOT be the the better parent. That helps. They recently revised their CS laws to protect lower income payors. Basically they are protecting the first poverty-level wages from the CS percentage that you make each year.
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby defaultuser » Sun Jan 10, 2010 1:05 pm

I don't think there are any Father friendly states. The best to hope for is a truly gender neutral state, or ones that promote something close to equal timesharing with the kids.

There are some states that aren't this way. Some states (OR I think) don't have joint legal custody. Others don't look at timesharing in regards to CS calcs, so you get no credit if you aren't the custodial parent.

Florida is my state and pretty good in my opinion. Florida basically removed the term custodial parent (there is no such thing anymore), and speaks only of a timesharing schedule of the minor children. CS is based on incomes and timesharing. It basically promotes, or at least provides for a decently fair 50/50 arrangment. Not an 'Advantage Father' state by any means, but doesn't really punish you for being male. There is alimony in FL, but is far from something that is presumed in every case.

It is a two party state in terms of audio recordings, so it makes it more difficult to prove the other party is a nut.

The judge is probably more important than the state laws.

If I were to set the things that make a state gender neutral they would be:
1. How is custody determined (mother presumed?)
2. Is the state laws set up to presume or promote a 50/50 timeshare?
3. How is CS calculated and is there any credit for time spent with the kids?
4. Does the state allow you to record other people without their knowledge? This goes a long way in being able to defend yourself against false DV charges, and proving the STBX is verbally abusive, proving all kinds of stuff.
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby PSUBIKER » Mon Jan 11, 2010 9:50 am

So far, I can't complain too much about my state, Delaware. The NJ was assured by her man hating attorney early on that DE always sides with the mom. I've learned the folloing:

- In Delaware, you are inelligible for alimony or spousal support once you cohabitate. Thus, if you are a NJ SAHM and want to move your unemployed, horse stall mucker 2nd cousin / boyfriend in, by all means go for it but don't expect you STBX husband to pay for it.

- CHild Support goes by the Melson formula and judges are very, very adverse to go against it. It also protects the first $13000 of yearly income from being included in the child support calculation since it assumes you have to support yourself before you can support the kids. THe Melson formula is basically an income shares model with a few more variables thrown in. If you have 50/50 shared and you and the NJ make the same amount, there is no child support.

- While the courts hand out ex parte protection orders like they are candy, once you go into the court room, the judges in my experience actually use the rules of evidence to determine if abuse occured. Thus, if your NJ said you sent emails threatening to harm her, the judge is going to want to see them or they will go Judgy Judy on you. I've had had 4 DV protection orders dismissed after trial so far.

- word is, my state is going towards a rebuttable persumption of 50/50 shared custody. We shall see what happens with this.
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Re: Which are Father-friendly states?

Unread postby SecondWife » Tue Jan 12, 2010 10:44 am

Does anyone know if NC is a fair state?
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