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Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:18 pm
by Trevor
Goddamnit.

Shoes are dropping everywhere. I hate that people in power have taken advantage of that power to gain sexual favors from those within their sphere of influence. This can go both ways, but do we in this country have the balls to address all the nuance? [Rhet.]

What's weird is that suddenly, the bodies of work of the people who are being outed are being pulled out of the marketplace to a degree. Kevin Spacey's new film, Louis CK's tv show, Charlie Rose's show. What happens when the sexual debauchery of, say, Motley Crue is next in line? Will they get shouted down at their performances? Will iTunes stop carrying their records?

Will I have to start hating Sting?

At some point, particularly in the music business, conversations may (?) drift to how there are women who seek out their favorite musicians in order to < edited > them. Will that lead to conversations about aggressive career women who < edited > their way to promotions? In a way, they are using their power (attractiveness) over those in their sphere of influence (certain weak-willed men) to gain some advantage. But right now, that's to un-PC to mention, I suppose.

I hope the CEO of Apple isn't next, cos I'm not giving up my fecking iPhone.

(As I write, I am watching the "turkey pardon" and you can't know how much I wish that bird would < feces > all over the president.)

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:27 pm
by BartSimpson
An interesting point is if it impacts you personally?

Are you walking down the supermarket aisle and avoiding eye contact with the woman going the other way?

Would you compliment a woman you know professionally?

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:35 pm
by Trevor
Thankfully this is not impacting me directly; meaning no one has accused me, nor anyone in my family. I don;t know anyone who's been accused either. Yet.

I don't avoid eye contact with women, no. I will still smile and say hello and make small talk. I have always kept my hands to myself in work and social situations where I am not in a relationship with the woman.

Complimenting women at work is easy. Focusing on their work performance is appropriate. "Focus on the situation, issue, or behavior, not the person." (AchieveGlobal)

Which should you never use at work?
A. "I like your cool shoes!"
B. "You handled that coaching situation perfectly."
C. "Nice <breasts>!"
D. "Your edits to my report added a lot of value."

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:44 pm
by BartSimpson
Yes, I get the rules. I’ve had the training over and over and over and over (multiply by 40 years).

And I, too, have been above reproach.

But now, with the hypersensitivity in the news, and the slightest offense proof of character, is avoidance a good position?

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:46 pm
by BartSimpson
Trevor: You did a good job.

Her: You mean you thought I couldn’t? HR! I’m calling HR because you diminished my capacity to perform by complimenting it. And you only said Good, not Excellent, so that’s another microagression. HR!

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:46 pm
by grandet2
I work with nearly all women and women are no saints themselves. But they can swing it anyway they want. The issues we are seeing are tip of the iceberg, both men/women in power abuse their position.

We just fired a director for sleeping with his direct reports (for years).

The company I worked for many years back the unofficial line was "It is not who you know, but who you bl.w".

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:52 pm
by Trevor
As our years on these boards have proven, clean hands are no guarantee that allegations would be avoided. Ergo, averted eyes and radio silence may work in most cases, but not all...but those scenarios would involve a malicious accuser.

I am hearing such strains in discussions about the topic - that men will tighten their cloisters of power and exclude "others" out of a defensive posture, thus making "equality" further and further from reality. Of course, men would be blamed for using their defensiveness as a premise to continue/double down on the good old boy culture.

What's the answer? Zero tolerance? Case by case? There is no one-size-fits-all answer.

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 1:56 pm
by Trevor
Trouble is, Bones, that people who have direct reports have a duty to assess performance against goals, at least once per year (monthly in more sensible organizations).

But not all performance is reflected in metrics. I think this year's Performance Management cycle is going to have an emphasis on language around subjective assessment areas such as interpersonal (soft) skills.

Fasten your seat belts, everyone!

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 2:03 pm
by BartSimpson
Well I was having this very thought as I shopped yesterday - where I would normally be happy to smile and acknowledge the woman coming down the aisle opposite me, because we are part of the same community - I found myself averting my eyes and became conscious of her differently.

The idea has been planted, and there is no erase button, but the choice remains mine and I’m wanting to make a difference in 100 years so I will turn toward that anxiety and say hello next time.

Re: Sexual Harassment in the news

Unread postPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 2:50 pm
by Trevor
Well said, Bones. Part of the same community. The choice is ours to be the bigger persons.