enforcing holiday parenting time -

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enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby mystery99114 » Thu Apr 13, 2017 9:59 am

Hi all-

From my previous post, I let my ex have my 3 yo daughter on my Saturday for her birthday. Start building good will, respect.

Ok, now this coming weekend is my ex's weekend. Also, Sunday is easter sunday. Odd year, she is with me.

Our agreement (stupidly) doesn't have a pick up time on this day.

It says "Mother shall have parenting time with the Child on Easter Sunday in even numbered years until 7:45PM. The Father shall have parenting time with the Child on Easter Sunday in odd-numbered years. "

I said via email that i will pick up my daughter at 9AM. (my rationale the agreement says the entire day). She writes back saying no: pick up at 11AM. I replied back and said our agreement states the entire day, (not the morning, afternoon, partial day), so I will pick up at 9.

Question (1) why is this woman determined to make everything about her ? (2) How far should I take this ? Should i be speaking to the local police department to enforce when I go pick up ? (3) I get from my last post, the opinion on this board is that I need to let this stuff roll off my shoulders, but i have an ex who determined to twist and screw everything around.
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby lovingfatherof2 » Thu Apr 13, 2017 10:31 am

Where you went wrong is telling her when you are picking her up, almost like you where demanding it.

Instead you should have said something along the lines of "Hey I was wondering what time works for you for me to pick up daughter? I was thinking 9am? Would that work for you?"
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby lionel2013 » Thu Apr 13, 2017 3:59 pm

I said via email that i will pick up my daughter at 9AM. (my rationale the agreement says the entire day). She writes back saying no: pick up at 11AM.


so all this is about two hours?
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby changeofplans » Thu Apr 13, 2017 4:38 pm

I would not fight over 2 hours. Perhaps take a look at the calendar and see where Easter falls next year-if it is her Easter on your weekend, I'd (nicely) point that out and try to come to an agreement that way.

For my kids, it works better to do those kinds of holidays starting the night before, so that they get the excitement of waking up to an Easter basket and they don't end up doing two celebrations within a few hours of each other.
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby Me_and_my_boys » Thu Apr 13, 2017 7:30 pm

mystery99114 wrote:Should i be speaking to the local police department to enforce when I go pick up ?


I wouldn't get the police involved.
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby lovingfatherof2 » Thu Apr 13, 2017 7:32 pm

Police won't get involved even if he did call.
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby Caruzzo » Thu Apr 13, 2017 8:36 pm

What time did she pick up for her birthday on your custodial Saturday?

Don't lose your cool over two hours. Next time one of her holidays comes up on your custodial day, 11:00 it is for her as well.

A better solution is to go through the entire parenting agreement and get EVERY detail clearly defined. Every drop-off time, every pick-up time, leave nothing up for interpretation. It will save you years of headaches.
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby Tom Kirkpatrick » Thu Apr 13, 2017 10:50 pm

If 9:00 AM is too early for NJ, then pick D3 up the night before. Tell NJ there's an Easter egg hunt at church or something.

IMHO - The holiday should include the overnight anyway.

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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby Chaos » Thu Apr 13, 2017 11:50 pm

She wants to do Easter morning with the kid too or she wouldn't be quibbling over two hours. Compromise with 10.
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Re: enforcing holiday parenting time -

Unread postby big guy » Fri Apr 14, 2017 12:18 pm

I suggest that you get your attitude and temper under control or you are going to lose big. A FB friend of mine lashed out at his ex over a situation similar to yours. He now rarely sees his daughter because he got angry with his ex and he put it in a form where it looked threatening. A restraining order that won't go away was the outcome.

It's two hours. Let it go.
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