Am I mental?

Your divorce and child custody agreements are final, get practical tips for moving on with your life after divorce.

Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby ragnar » Fri Jan 06, 2017 11:21 am

Chasbo wrote:So asking for advice here or anywhere will get you the best practice in most common situations. You need to have the ability to judge your own situation.

Having said that, screwing a woman specifically so that your son can get a friend is at the least incredibly weird☺️


Going through a divorce, I get the craziness that can occur. I don't think post divorce I could date a separated woman (unless there was a very good reason) and I think I understand why divorced women generally don't want to date separated guys.

Regarding the quoted piece. Regarding sentence 1, I have a psychologist for that ;)

Regarding sentence 2, think of it this way. 20 years ago I found this initially attractive:
1) Educated
2) decent face (models not required)
3) not fat
4) nice boobies
5) nice < hindquarters >
6) friendly
7) NO KIDS

Today, I find the same things attractive but I can add the following:
7) (modified from above) Has no kids and wants one at most.
8) Has kids and doesn't want more
8a) Under this scenario, I find women with kids closer to my kids ages more attractive.
8b) Under this scenario, I find women with kids not near my kids ages less attractive.

I'm not saying that I is required. I'm just saying that I find it more attractive.

We'll have to see where time and fate take me though.

I'm just saying, with my state of life I find certain things attractive more so than I did 20 years ago.
8)
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby ragnar » Fri Jan 06, 2017 11:28 am

BartSimpson wrote:Are you close to your step-brother?


We live about 1000 miles apart so not anymore. Growing up he was just my brother though. It didn't even dawn on me that he was a step brother till I was in high school. People that met my family were often shocked that we were step brothers.
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby ragnar » Fri Jan 06, 2017 11:29 am

afc wrote:It's not healthy to regard the marriage as a thing that can die. Die is such a loaded word and should really only be used for formerly biologically living things in order to keep perspective.

No wonder you have this feeling deep down that you need to replace the marriage fairly soon with another relationship. It's the same feeling pet owners have when their old beloved dog dies.

The marriage was not a thing with its own life. It was a partnership and the partnership as it was dissolved and a new kind of partnership is replacing it.


OK, in that context I get it.
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby ragnar » Fri Jan 06, 2017 11:29 am

UPDATE on meetup girl..... she messaged me.

Ya, she is weird and definitely interested in me. Not going to bother posting the messages but they are downright weird.
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby BartSimpson » Fri Jan 06, 2017 11:30 am

When was the last time you saw your brother face-to-face?
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby afc » Fri Jan 06, 2017 11:31 am

Then just ignore her messages. You owe her no reply and it will only bring consternation into your life.

Delete messages and block her number

Problem solved
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby Havalu7 » Fri Jan 06, 2017 11:36 am

And don't go in to a coffee shop if you are not ready to drink coffee.
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby ragnar » Fri Jan 06, 2017 12:23 pm

BartSimpson wrote:When was the last time you saw your brother face-to-face?

About a year ago. I plan to go there this summer to visit.
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby ragnar » Fri Jan 06, 2017 12:24 pm

afc wrote:Then just ignore her messages. You owe her no reply and it will only bring consternation into your life.

Delete messages and block her number

Problem solved


Thankfully it is only private message through the meetup app. I didn't give her my contact info. I am not replying.
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Re: Am I mental?

Unread postby BartSimpson » Fri Jan 06, 2017 12:35 pm

You should go now. Right away. At your earliest chance.

Even if only for a weekend. You should have a chat with your brother - he knows you, and he will understand you, the guy you were before this marriage. All this about women and whatnot, talking to your brother will help you get in touch with that person who lived in your brain before the wife came along and scrambled it.

Besides, you'll be dating this stalker by summer and you won't have a chance.
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