CrashDavis wrote:Hi I am new here but thought this was an interesting thread. My ex and I went the mediation route in NoVA because we knew neighter of us would come out very far ahead if we went legal route. We'd both end up poor and HATE each other, not good for our little girl. I had a lot of non-marital assets coming into the marriage, a home, large colle tion of vintage toys, etc. In our 9 years of marriage we sold my first home and used the equity to buy a home together. I did 99% of the remodeling myself and at the time of separation we had another $90-100k in gained equity. I made the deal to split that with her and give her full pick of all other marital assetts. Nicest car, tv's furniture, plates, all that crap that can be replaced.
The mediation agreement cost about $3000 total, we split the costs.
I figure she took $45-50K in marital assets.
I wrote her a check for $40k to buy her out of the house.
So kept the the 5br house in Loudoun county (value increases monthly and it is as cheap as an apartment now here), got very liberal < parenting time > with my daughter, she couldnt touch my vintage collection of Star Wars memorabilia.
We are very cordial and our divorce is final in May. Will be glad when it is all over.....I feel I did very good and I am sorry to read some stories in there. My best advice is to be as nice as you can be. Tell her you know it is over and beg for mediation if you can do it...I know it cant always go this way but identify what is important to you and try to get it. Give her more of things yiu dont care about. All about a good compromise.
May is a long ways away. What are your contingency plans? What is "liberal parenting time"? Has she already cashed the check for $40,000?