Bearing it All

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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby fisher_dad » Wed Jan 10, 2018 1:36 am

NJ lunged over the back of the couch, over my shoulder to grab my wrist/phone that was recording at the time in addition to the DAR in my pocket since she was ranting and raving about a key I supposedly made and got into her car and stole "something" from her. (last time it was a bottle of wine she was looking for that I had never touched). I only repeated please stop, and not in front of the children who were sitting on either side of me during the incident.

I called the police and have a report in. No one went to jail. This is not the first incident of her getting physical with me. (police report assault a couple years back, shoving and increasingly aggressive behavior more recently) It's hard to feel that's enough to do much given the typical response. The aggressive behavior is normal on her part, and I just try to keep calm. A year in and that < feces > is pretty old, and the constant put downs in front of the kids she dishes out are on the ignore list, though the look on my kid's faces when they hear those things being that of "this is normal" is not ok.

Could something worthwhile be executed in the interim based on what I have or am I best enduring more cohab hell until the day is here?
You get what you put up with.

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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby massdad1234 » Wed Jan 10, 2018 6:11 am

Have you filed something with the courts? That doesn't sound like a good environment, but if you feel that physical violence isn't ok, I would look to have the mother removed immediately (cops won't do that).
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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby Trevor » Wed Jan 10, 2018 8:17 am

TRO immediately following the incident. Do it.
"Personal density is directly proportional to temporal bandwidth."
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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby dad2grls » Wed Jan 10, 2018 10:40 am

I can't imagine a court will issue a restraining order because she grabbed for your recording device.
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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby Trevor » Wed Jan 10, 2018 11:42 am

She grabbed for his phone and was acting in a threatening manner, and there is a history of the same (not sure if the police were called then).

OP, read the form that one completes when requesting a TRO and see if it fits your scenario.
"Personal density is directly proportional to temporal bandwidth."
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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby Havalu7 » Wed Jan 10, 2018 11:59 pm

OP go down to the office that accepts these forms and describe to them what happend.

Just because the officers didnt arrest her does not mean that the judge will not say "hell no that is not ok" especially becasue it happened right in between the kids (if I read your post right).

The folks working that desk have probably heard a thousand other situations like yours described. Then file it with them and let the judge decide. I would not be suprised if they don't notify you asap and the judge asks to hear your story in person.

Dont play with fire in your own house. If you dont care about yourself do it for your kids dude.

OP one last note; look at how long Trevor has been on this forum. I'm just a new guy who got to experience somthing very similar to you. The fact that Trevor is telling you to go file should be bank for you as he (and other vets here) have seen this play out over and over.

Don' t be the guy coming back here saying "I should have listened to you guys'. She has earned this as a result of HER actions. Get it done like tomorrow morning. Keep us posted and keep the darn phone in your pocket too. DAR rolling full time.
"No." is a complete sentence.

Do not move out of your house.
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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby fisher_dad » Thu Jan 11, 2018 1:11 pm

Thank you guys.

I talked to the magistrate today, and am going to have my lawyer submit for PFA citing current misdemeanor report and previous/continuing behavior of NJ. Last night I asked her for my thermometer back to take kiddos temp, and it came sailing across the room and bounced off the wall.
My kids don't need that kind of behavior in their lives.
You get what you put up with.

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Re: Bearing it All

Unread postby massdad1234 » Thu Jan 11, 2018 1:54 pm

ok, you sound like you know what needs to be done. Zero regrets and move forward. People are in control of their actions, they don't get to control the consequences. Something I share with my kids when they break the rules.
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