Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

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Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby disgusteddad » Mon Nov 06, 2017 7:21 pm

I agreed to discontinue the divorce filing so that my wife could continue on my health insurance for a year.

We signed a divorce agreement. Unfortunately there are numerous non compliance issues with her.

I want to make the agreement court ordered so that it will have more weight. I am self-representing because all of my money got spent on putting the agreement together.

My first attempt at getting the divorce back on the calendar was with an Order to Show Cause because of "numerous non-compliance issues." This was turned down by the judge.

I have several options:

1. Resubmit an Order to Show Cause with "Irreconcilable Differences" as the reason (which does not bind the court to solve the issues mentioned). The problem with this is that the judge's secretary said that he likes all re-submissions of divorce filings to be with a new index number. Why?

2. Start a new case with a new index number. I am afraid that will open me up for more negotiations.

3. Start a new case in civil court for breach of contract.

4. Stop paying her and let her start the process with her attorney. The problem here is that she will then most likely stop giving me access to the kids. The plus side of this is that there is a clause in the agreement that states that if I file early that I am liable for her health care costs until June of 2018. If she files I am not liable.

Any help you could give me would be much appreciated!
Last edited by disgusteddad on Tue Nov 07, 2017 2:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby gamingdad » Mon Nov 06, 2017 8:11 pm

timbreese60 wrote:I agreed to discontinue the divorce filing so that my wife could continue on my health insurance for a year.

We signed a divorce agreement. Unfortunately there are numerous non compliance issues with her.

I want to make the agreement court ordered so that it will have more weight. I am self-representing because all of my money got spent on putting the agreement together.

My first attempt at getting the divorce back on the calendar was with an Order to Show Cause because of "numerous non-compliance issues." This was turned down by the judge.

I have several options:

1. Resubmit an Order to Show Cause with "Irreconcilable Differences" as the reason (which does not bind the court to solve the issues mentioned). The problem with this is that the judge's secretary said that he likes all re-submissions of divorce filings to be with a new index number. Why?

2. Start a new case with a new index number. I am afraid that will open me up for more negotiations.

3. Start a new case in civil court for breach of contract.

4. Stop paying her and let her start the process with her attorney. The problem here is that she will then most likely stop giving me access to the kids. The plus side of this is that there is a clause in the agreement that states that if I file early that I am liable for her health care costs until June of 2018. If she files I am not liable.

Any help you could give me would be much appreciated!

What state?
How many kids?
Your the dad. Barring any court documents, she can't deny you access to your own kids.
What is current parenting plan and timeshare?
READ YOUR PAPERWORK BEFORE SIGNING! IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS, ASK!
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby TJinCA » Tue Nov 07, 2017 12:52 am

What exactly is the state of this? It sounds like one of you has filed for divorce and the other has responded, but are there any temporary court orders regarding custody, child support or alimony? If not, what are you paying her and why?

Sounds like you've arrived at a settlement agreement but it hasn't been submitted to the court as a stipulated judgment. So I don't know how much legal force it has if any. So the judge probably doesn't care about her "non-compliance" with something that's not court-ordered.

The court process can be complicated, especially if you're doing non-standard stuff. I'd say you need some advice from a lawyer to make sure you proceed the right way. It will cost, but might be a lot cheaper than mucking this up by yourself.
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby Fatheroffour » Tue Nov 07, 2017 6:43 am

This is why you dont move out, or allow her to move out and take the kids.
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby massdad1234 » Tue Nov 07, 2017 8:49 am

OP - tell me this wasn't a case of your ex getting you to cancel your pending legal paperwork so that she can tell you what to do and then file?

how many overnights per 4 week schedule (total of 28 max) do you have?
Not seeing anyone else yet are we?
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby disgusteddad » Tue Nov 07, 2017 1:30 pm

I have a Stipulation of Settlement in New York which includes a "So Ordered" Custody and Access Settlement, Distribution of Assets, and Support. It has an index number and we met numerous times with a referee. It never went to court. It is signed and notarized by both parties. She insisted on continuing on my health insurance until next June and if I were to file early I would be liable for her health insurance costs. No penalty if she files early.

I just want to get the divorce filed so that I can file further motions about her non-compliance.

Are you saying that the judge won't care about her non-compliance if it is not court ordered?

Custody is not the issue.
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby HaltAndCatchFire » Wed Nov 08, 2017 8:52 am

What's preventing you from sending the notarized settlement agreement to the Court to be signed by a judge? That's what you need to focus on. You got the hard part done, now take it across the finish line.
The only way out is through.
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby gamingdad » Wed Nov 08, 2017 11:51 am

disgusteddad wrote:The problem here is that she will then most likely stop giving me access to the kids.


disgusteddad wrote:Custody is not the issue.


Those two statements are polar opposites


What is your current parenting plan?
READ YOUR PAPERWORK BEFORE SIGNING! IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS, ASK!
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby disgusteddad » Wed Nov 08, 2017 12:00 pm

We are to agree on a parenting plan during their school year which is 95% finished. My concern is that if I stop paying her she will say that all agreements are off and obstruct my < parenting time >.
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Re: Filing for Divorce after Discontinuance - non-compliance

Unread postby BartSimpson » Wed Nov 08, 2017 12:06 pm

Extra-legal agreements are meaningless as you have no way to enforce the agreement.

The only thing this agreement did was establish the price of your children.
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