Here's a problem that I'm seeing:
You are withholding funds from your STBX, but still providing for her and your daughter, I see no problem with that. However, you should be banking those funds as they are still community vs. using them to pay for Residence 2. I am thinking that your STBX can effectively make the argument that you unilaterally spent community funds towards something that was strictly for your benefit and you may one day be ordered to give them back out of your portion of the settlement.
Deciding to go forward with a divorce is kind of like joining a brotherhood. However, it is a brotherhood that you really don't want to join.