Getting Started: Texas

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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby dofb » Sun Apr 16, 2017 9:15 pm

BartSimpson wrote:While you are researching SMART Recovery, take a look at Orange-Papers.org - specifically the information about the impact of AA on family.

As part of your case preparation, you should read up on the CDC health study called ACE - Adverse Childhood Experiences - conducted with Kaiser Health. Note how many of the factors your son has, and the eventual impact on his life. Your son is at risk for his own issues, including compulsive behaviors.

The issue the mother has is easily explained as a compulsive behavior - it is not a disease. By way of introduction, I am a licensed physician in the State of California and speak with certain qualification. While your wife is being treated for her bi-polar condition, the absence of Naltrexone means her drug use isn't being addressed. You should take a look at what Naltrexone does.


Bart, this is by far the best post you have posted on these AA type programs. My wife joined AlAnon to deal with her mother's drinking and while we had marital problems, a whole bunch of others got added on. Next thing I know, things are off the rails and "she doesn't love me anymore" and we are getting a divorce. I don't know what they teach in these programs, but I sure hope karma bites them in the < hindquarters >.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby deepintheheart » Mon Apr 17, 2017 1:02 pm

If anyone has recommendations for lawyer in Austin, TX area, I would appreciate a PM. Thanks.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby Thoughts? » Mon Apr 17, 2017 2:11 pm

Just PM'd you mine. Good guy, have worked with him on my cases & helping several other guy's cases. Very father friendly.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby Thoughts? » Mon Apr 17, 2017 2:22 pm

BTW, there's one case in particular that parallels yours that I'm thinking of. Involving a six year'ish old boy & a mom's love for vodka, as in hiding it all over the house. Several failed rehabs. Dad threw in the towel, went for sole & supervised. This attorney arranged special alcohol use testing, where the testing device dialed in results to a central tracker, that was used to help decide if she could get time or not. I can't mention names as it was all in confidence, but if you share this scenario to the attorney I suggested, he'll know what it is. If he needs a memory tickler, remind him there was angry grandpa who threatened to kick my < hindquarters > at the courthouse (I was a primary witness). ;)

One thing I want to ask you about re your son...any signs of fetal alcohol syndrome? Not trying to scare you, but some times their addictive tendencies have existed for many years, until you realize how bad they are.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby deepintheheart » Mon Apr 17, 2017 4:43 pm

Thanks for the PM; lawyer consultation scheduled next week.

I just checked some symptoms for FAS, doesn't seem to chime in with my son. Thanks for the info.

Getting together my journal now.

I also have a large list of specialty appointments that I took him too during this time period; I'll get those documented (I'm lucky to have an understanding job, lots of vacation, and flexibility).

Called my 401K provider and asked for a statement showing balance of my 401K the month we were married.

I'll just start pecking away at the list and listen to what my lawyer has to say next week.
Last edited by deepintheheart on Mon Apr 24, 2017 4:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby Thoughts? » Mon Apr 17, 2017 5:24 pm

Main point of journaling is to give yourself notes to trigger your memory & to load your lawyer's magazine in trial prep. Sure, put the schedule in as you state so. Where specific activities take place that show your parenting role, by all means, put those in. For example, reading time at the local Barnes & Noble. Kindergarden Roundup on such & such a date, where she couldn't attend due to do-over of rehab. Age 6 doctor checkup & shots, such & such a date. Dental exam, xyz date. Etc.

Execute to the list best you can & move forward. You're on the right track.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby RockyCali » Tue Apr 18, 2017 9:51 pm

Backdate all you want, as long as you know it's true. It's all about connecting as many dots -- and lines of dots -- as possible. A lot of times journaling triggers other memories. By all means create another entry and then go change the date to what you know it to be.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby deepintheheart » Wed Apr 19, 2017 5:35 am

RockyCali wrote:Backdate all you want, as long as you know it's true. It's all about connecting as many dots -- and lines of dots -- as possible. A lot of times journaling triggers other memories. By all means create another entry and then go change the date to what you know it to be.


Copy that...I keep all my appts with my son in my outlook, so it will be easy to backdate and document.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby deepintheheart » Sun Jun 18, 2017 9:16 am

Update:

TO signed and in place. I have exclusive right of residence, pretty close to sole conservatorship for my son (wording states joint managing conservator BUT it spells out exclusive rights for me on the mains such as designate primary residence, medical, education, etc.).

Supervised < parenting time > is in place for NJ; also I can issue two random drug tests per month. Zero temp spousal maintenance; zero temp child support.

Mr. Wonderful Effect 100% in play; NJ focused on getting her share of the cash and wants it quickly. NJ eying the money, I'm focused on my son. This forum saved me from making huge mistake and bringing up Mr. W in spite/anger. Hopefully Mr. W will continue for a couple more weeks, since final decree is composed and ready for her review and siggy.
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Re: Getting Started: Texas

Unread postby Havalu7 » Sun Jun 18, 2017 11:38 am

Good update brother.

Now you have some time to pick up a gravel shovel and start helping the new guys (especially in areas similar to your case).

Just a quick greeting or a question regarding their parenting plan, age of kids and state of residence so that we can get them engaged like was done with you.

You've heard the saying "Pay it forward".

Welcome back on board.

Happy Father's Day Pops!
”No is a complete sentence” Unknown
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