Scorched earth or good enough deal?

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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby JimRockford » Mon Mar 20, 2017 2:21 pm

dofb wrote:One lump sum payment for my part of childcare for four years.


She takes the lump sum and buys something big and stupid, attempts to increase it's value at the casino, or invests in a business opportunity with a new Mr. Wonderful. In all the cases above, assume that that the plan did not work, the money is gone, and the children are now suffereing. You now have a problem, while you can argue that she got the money and blew it away, the court is going to want the children supported and if you have the ability, you get to pay
twice.

Ignore this post, I initially thought you were thinking of the even worse idea of paying CS up front. FatherofFour got it right
Last edited by JimRockford on Mon Mar 20, 2017 2:27 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby Fatheroffour » Mon Mar 20, 2017 2:22 pm

What if the provider shuts down?
What if the provider doesn't provide adequate care?
What if exwife dies and your new wife can care for the child?
What if ex wife moves away and you are paid up for 3 more years.

Lots of what ifs.
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby Gobsmacked » Mon Mar 20, 2017 2:55 pm

Don't forget, if you pay direct to the childcare provider you can deduct it from taxes too.
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby hoosier_dad » Mon Mar 20, 2017 3:04 pm

dofb wrote:What else am I not seeing?

You're also missing the large child care credit you'll receive on the CSOW. I want to say this is somewhere in the range of 60-70 cents on the dollar you'll get credited off your CS amount by paying for child care monthly. You do have that figured into your CS amount correct?
dofb wrote:Hoosierdad - I cannot make budgets meet if I don't pay up front.

If you have the money to pay up front then you have the money to pay month to month, just set it aside today in a savings account used only for child care.

Something tells me you are way overpaying CS, and handing over a significant chunk for spousal maintenance that is no where close to being a sure thing for your STBX if the case went to court.
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby dofb » Mon Mar 20, 2017 4:56 pm

I was going to pay her up front from the 401k. I hear everything being said and it does make sense. In 4 years, I will not care about child care, as it will be minimal and within whatever's left of my income after CS.

Also, I will put in a no-relo agreement in place. Is that even legal?
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby hoosier_dad » Mon Mar 20, 2017 5:31 pm

dofb wrote:And I will pay the providers up front.

dofb wrote:I was going to pay her up front from the 401k.

You seem to be going back and forth here. Hopefully you've been dissuaded from paying up front, but you also need to be clear that no childcare payments will go directly to your STBX, they will always be paid directly to the childcare providers.
dofb wrote:Also, I will put in a no-relo agreement in place. Is that even legal?

Indiana has pretty strong relocation statutes. For either parent to move across the street, they have to legally notify the other parent as well as the court with specific information. If the non-relocating parent contests the move it will be scheduled for a hearing. The best way to fight a move away is with 50/50 physical custody.
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby dofb » Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:31 pm

I was going to offer more from the 401k or the pension. But, after hearing from you guys, I am more inclined to take a hardship withdrawal and then use that bulk money to pay for childcare. We were going to split childcare 50/50 anyway, despite the fact that her attorney wants to go after me for the income split.

Someone mentioned that I probably have my calculations wrong, but when I put in my 140k income, she at minimum wage, 50/50 time split, it does come to 476/week anyway.
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby hoosier_dad » Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:44 pm

dofb wrote:Someone mentioned that I probably have my calculations wrong, but when I put in my 140k income, she at minimum wage, 50/50 time split, it does come to 476/week anyway.


That doesn't include your weekly health insurance premium for your children or the work related child care costs right? Both of those will decrease your CS obligation.

CS is pretty straightforward if you have the inputs correct. I'm curious about the spousal maintenance numbers you and your STBX are throwing around?
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby dofb » Mon Mar 20, 2017 8:52 pm

I am not sure if I have my numbers correct. There's also the fact that we will do a transition for the #4 and #3. I have a high-deductible plan, so the premiums are practically nothing ($20-$30 per week). The spousal support is $125 a week. I have to say, we are trying to keep things amicable. We will probably be at most 5 miles away from each other's place.
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Re: Scorched earth or good enough deal?

Unread postby Rorschach » Tue Mar 21, 2017 10:52 am

Hi

Also an Indiana guy. Most of your issues have already been covered, just want to add a few thoughts

1. 50/50 for all the kids man. My daughter was 2 when we split, I work 60-70 hours a week with a 90 min round trip commute and still got it. Don't give up an opportunity to be a dad to the youngest. I had to do EOW only for 6 months and it sucked. You won't like it.

2. Give up on ROFR. Everyone wants it, it's technically a legal requirement but it's almost unenforceable. Costs a ton of money to fight over it. Focus on the 50/50 instead.

3. Don't pay CS directly to her. Use the state program. It comes directly out of your paycheck so there's no worrying about it. It leaves a nice trail and is easy to prove you're up to date and making the payments if she tries to argue.

4. There's a standard 60 day notice in place to notify the other person of a potential move leaving you plenty of time to file a request to deny. Get 50/50 and live in the same school district as the kids and she won't be able to move out of the district. That's the best protection
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