Finally Trying to do this Right

Tips on divorce for men considering or starting the divorce process. Get marriage separation tips for men in this divorce forum and child custody forum.

Re: Finally Trying to do this Right

Unread postby WantToMoveOn » Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:11 pm

Not like that guys. I know it's weird, but we have been in an open marriage for quite a while. Even when things were better. Probably shouldn't have mentioned that on the forum.

For a while we were going to attempt to co-habitat for our little one's benefit. Even tried to find a way to divorce but still live together. Seeing as how we generally still get along very well.
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Re: Finally Trying to do this Right

Unread postby Havalu7 » Fri Mar 17, 2017 2:47 pm

:oops:
”Even a word is an action.” Vaclav Havel
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Re: Finally Trying to do this Right

Unread postby JimRockford » Fri Mar 17, 2017 3:08 pm

WantToMoveOn wrote:For a while we were going to attempt to co-habitat for our little one's benefit.


I see lots of therapy ahead for the little one. Is there a way to pre-pay it now at a lower rate?
Deciding to go forward with a divorce is kind of like joining a brotherhood. However, it is a brotherhood that you really don't want to join.
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Re: Finally Trying to do this Right

Unread postby Minerva » Fri Mar 17, 2017 3:24 pm

I don't understand why you would obligate yourself to spousal support and daycare expenses willingly.

Seems like you are still looking to be the white knight saving her from bad situations.

You can always be a white knight if you want but you don't really want the court ordering you to be due to your own silly plan. Why should you pay for daycare so she can LOOK for a job? Realistically she's going to sit on her < hindquarters > because you're paying for everything. She should be watching the kid until she works, at which time you can split the bills.

Alimony is a discussion you should only have with an attorney. Are you sure you have to pay anything? Keep in mind whatever you offer will likely be defined as status quo and be the new minimum.

You seem to be giving up a lot of ground with little received in return. Looks like you're putting on your own noose.

It's one thing to remain cordial but you really appear from your comments as a white knight, just from the way you talk about your stbx and the situation.
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Re: Finally Trying to do this Right

Unread postby Rssooner » Fri Mar 17, 2017 4:11 pm

Havalu7 wrote:WTFrick you are both seeing someone?

Ignore the Great One at your peril. Sooner perhaps you should spend more time researching cupcakes and Captain Savaho before you start giving out dating advice.

Stick to picking NCAA teams and I would suggest looking away from your home state of your namesake:-)

Kidding on the last line Boomer. Remeber with newbies be careful gong against proven strategies and veterans posts (and I am a newbie to).

OP look at how long someone had been a member here before you take their strategy seriously and although not a litmus test telling some to date while still married AND living together?

Reallly? Jumped off any cliffs lately. But go ahead and get back to us on how that all worked out.

Geez.


Havalu
It amazes me how giving someone advise about what their going through is critized so much and quite immaturely to say the least. I was simply pointing out how his story appeared to be similar to mine and shared with him what my thoughts were. I did not mention one thing about dating advice. You don't have to be a 20K post person to try and help someone through a tough time. By responding to others helps people heal and become stronger knowing that they are trying to help someone. Instead of wasting your time insulting me, maybe you can respond to others and actually help them.
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Re: Finally Trying to do this Right

Unread postby Fatheroffour » Sat Mar 18, 2017 5:55 am

Give the guy a break. They were in an open marriage and clearly have less puritanical views about sex.
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Re: Finally Trying to do this Right

Unread postby Havalu7 » Sat Mar 18, 2017 10:37 pm

Boomer I apologize that I misread your comment about the boyfriend.
”Even a word is an action.” Vaclav Havel
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