New, have no idea how to start this....

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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby BartSimpson » Tue Jan 10, 2017 4:06 pm

There is no need to quote the prior post in response - many of us read this forum on our phones and it sucks to thumb through everything twice.

You have to stop snooping, you understand that, right?
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby Electrical Guy » Tue Jan 10, 2017 4:11 pm

Yes, one of my worst traits. I've stopped.
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby BartSimpson » Tue Jan 10, 2017 4:16 pm

Do you have some sort of family plan for cell service? Does that allow you access to the mother's usage?
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby RC411V » Tue Jan 10, 2017 4:22 pm

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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby Electrical Guy » Wed Jan 11, 2017 9:12 am

Bart - Yes, I we have a family plan and I have access to the mothers usage. W

Why?
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby BartSimpson » Wed Jan 11, 2017 9:26 am

A general statement first - you should not pay for anything before the divorce that you do not want to pay for after the divorce.

The wifey's complaint - that you are spying on her - can be addressed head-on. Her concern for privacy justifies you cutting the family cell plan, and she is welcome to port her number to any old service provider that she wishes. Paying whatever the cost to get her off of a shared plan is going to be minor compared to the expense of legal fees debating how you have been stalking her and "controlling".

The family plan, as with many things, is a perk of the marriage. She can put her big-girl pants on and start to cover her own expenses, as she will have to in the future.

One important aspect to dealing with your known trait of snooping, is to cut the opportunities to do so as you enter the period that matters most. More importantly, how can she deny this independence of her own cell account if she is concerned of living under the microscope. I bet she keeps her phone password protected now, so that you can't access it, out of similar fears.

Make sense? To be certain, this probably extends to internet service at home. Do you share computers?
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby Electrical Guy » Wed Jan 11, 2017 9:56 am

Actually her phone is password protected but she knows I know the PW - MC suggested that. And W has no problem with me going through her phone, reassuring me she has nothing to hide.

We hardly use the computer at home. Most work or whatever is done on the shared iPad.

I could have her pay her own phone, but the expense on getting her off my contract could be astronomical. I will look into this.

This is where I need my < hindquarters > kicked. Her meager salary barely affords dinner for the family, let alone trying to cover her own bills.

2x4 please.
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby BartSimpson » Wed Jan 11, 2017 10:41 am

You're an electrician, not a carpenter. We do anything to you, it's going to involve lot's of amperage.

Sir, you've come to the fork in the road. We all have our independent experiences, but some matters frequently discussed on this forum converge into distinct conclusions. We know that innocent things like family plans and shared computers blow up in the face of false accusations - suddenly the wifey's current tone of "I've got nothing to hide" becomes "he's stalking me, harassing me, and I fear for my safety"

Your primary objective must be your own safety. These entanglements are a risk to your safety.

Please tell me you are not participating in this forum on a shared device?
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby Electrical Guy » Wed Jan 11, 2017 10:49 am

Absolutely not.
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Re: New, have no idea how to start this....

Unread postby BartSimpson » Wed Jan 11, 2017 10:49 am

What's up with the 26 year old?
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