Mediation Question

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Mediation Question

Unread postby Super Man » Mon Jan 09, 2017 6:11 pm

I am looking for help writing and verbage to my mediation intake sheet.

Question on form says- What parenting schedule would you like?

Is it okay to say maintain current court ordered schedule, which is supervised visits? Is this a good place to add verbage as, would like to set milestones, such as sobriety, etc etc.

Basically looking how to answer that question showing concern.

Also do I put asking for sole Physical and sole legal in this question?
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby Outis » Mon Jan 09, 2017 6:20 pm

How about answering it honestly?

"Unsure"

You'll get a chance to explain when you meet with the mediator.

"I'd really like the kids to have a great relationship with their mom when she's ready. But I'm not sure what's appropriate for now, and how we get to where we want to be once she's healthy and sober."
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby BartSimpson » Mon Jan 09, 2017 6:36 pm

I suggest you avoid using the word "sober" as a milestone - people can be sober and batchit crazy. Balanced life.

Articulating the SMART 4 points might help:

Supervised parenting time should build and maintain the mother's motivation for coping with urges. When the mother demonstrates managing her thoughts, feelings and behaviors, the mother should return to unsupervised parenting. When the mother is living a balanced life, she should enjoy equal parenting status and decision making.
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby Trevor » Mon Jan 09, 2017 9:34 pm

FT employment is a good expectation a progress marker too. Six months?
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby Outis » Mon Jan 09, 2017 9:36 pm

I think a year of stable, FT employment is a good benchmark. I'd start there over 6 months, at least. Leaves a lot more room to negotiate down, if needed.
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby Havalu7 » Mon Jan 09, 2017 9:42 pm

How about a stable residential history of 6 months?
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby Super Man » Mon Jan 09, 2017 10:29 pm

What about bringing up she was court ordered to wear a Scram bracklet for 1 year to monitor her alcohol consumption.

With that being 1 year, I was thinking to set milestones at 1 year and then review. Is 1 year no alcohol consumption asking for alot?

Just thinking since that has already been ordered, to use that as a benchmark standard.
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby BartSimpson » Mon Jan 09, 2017 10:51 pm

Here we go again.

Sir, you've got this. You need not fret over this mandated mediation, you need not pile on.

The mother can't make it through supervised parenting time - the mother is certain to flip out on the mediator long before you have to point out she isn't wearing the monitor she was court ordered to wear.

I'll give it 20 minutes or less and the mother is shown the door by the mediator.
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby Super Man » Mon Jan 09, 2017 11:23 pm

BartSimpson wrote:Here we go again.

Sir, you've got this. You need not fret over this mandated mediation, you need not pile on.

The mother can't make it through supervised parenting time - the mother is certain to flip out on the mediator long before you have to point out she isn't wearing the monitor she was court ordered to wear.

I'll give it 20 minutes or less and the mother is shown the door by the mediator.


I am thinking the same thing. I will report back. I like the feedback above.
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Re: Mediation Question

Unread postby Super Man » Wed Jan 11, 2017 8:35 pm

Update:

Mediation I believe went well. I went in alone first due to STBX having a PRO against her.

Mediator listened and asked alot of questions, mostly on mental health and substance abuse.

STBX asked to get off supervised visits and Joint legal custody.

She said it appeared our kid was doing great on current schedule along with school.

I also brought up milestones and she agreed. Milestones being on her feet, stable, and alcohol free. I stated that 1 year to start and reevaluate.

She also stated it is presumed that with the DV, that she cannot recomend STBX joint legal being there is no communication with the PRO in place.

She also stated she was going to call the visitTion monitor and see what she has to say.

All in all, I feel it went great. Report should take 7 days.
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