I've been reading through the forums here and that has started me journaling all of my interaction with the kids.
I have 2 kids and have been married for about 10 years now. The past two have been very rough as I had been trying hard to make things work, but came to realize that no matter how hard you try, she needs to want it to work too. At this point I have no suspicion or evidence of her doing anything behind my back, but she has taken on a role that leaves me feeling much like a single dad that has taken a vow of celibacy. As far as documenting that I play the primary role with the kids, I don't see any issues with that end as I am almost 100% certain that I'm the only one who has ever met with their teachers, pick the kids up from school almost every day, make dinner, lunch, etc, help the kids with homework and other activities like science fair etc. ,where she attempts to detach herself from the kids and I as often as possible, spending less than less than 2 hours with the kids in a typical week.
At this point for the sake of the kids and myself, I really just want out. there are a couple of things though that make me a little hesitant about filing however.
1. about 5 years ago she and I had used self directed IRA's to start a franchise. She currently runs the franchise while I am not very involved, but my 401k had funded about 80% of the startup costs. I don't really want to see this just evaporate, but if I force the sale of the franchise, it puts her out of work, which from what I've read may not play well for me in court.
2. this is more than likely not a huge issue, but she tends to hord a lot of the financial documents. I do see most of them, and have access to most via the internet, but is the goal to keep her in the dark?
I also want to ask, is it helpful if she has no local family? My family is local to us and involved in the kids lives, but most of her family live overseas and rarely see the kids.