A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Discussions on technology and its application and implications in divorce

A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby George Roy » Thu Feb 27, 2014 7:41 pm

Hello all,

Short version: Divorce. STBX had an affair.

Although STBX has been playing nice, it's been tough to figure out what her game plan may be at this point..

STBX recently upgraded to a new phone. And left the old one (out of service) sitting on the dresser.

Quite a few texts have been deleted (it's obvious based on the frequency of her usage).
There are a few still on there, but nothing incriminating.

A look at the other side's possible plans could be a serious game changer.

Is there a way to recover text messages from an out of service phone ?

Any input and suggestions are appreciated.
"The general who wins the battle makes many calculations in his temple before the battle is fought. The general who loses makes but few calculations beforehand" - Sun Tzu
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby Trevor » Thu Feb 27, 2014 10:37 pm

george roy wrote:A look at the other side's possible plans could be a serious game changer.

Dead end. They're gone. And I doubt seriously anything you find would change your outcome more than a degree or two. Why? Because you base your strategy on your goals, not hers. Stop wasting time with this.
"Personal density is directly proportional to temporal bandwidth."
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby Navistar » Thu Feb 27, 2014 10:44 pm

She doesnt really need a stratwgy because shes female. Worry about you
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby George Roy » Fri Feb 28, 2014 7:33 am

Trevor wrote:Dead end. They're gone. And I doubt seriously anything you find would change your outcome more than a degree or two. Why? Because you base your strategy on your goals, not hers. Stop wasting time with this.


Navistar wrote:She doesnt really need a stratwgy because shes female. Worry about you


Thanks, Trevor and Navistar,

I have been focusing on my strategy and goals.
I've been documenting everything I do with and for my children.

And I think you're right, Trevor. Unless there was a nuclear missile coming ("I'm gonna take the kids next Sunday and file a false DV charge on him"), anything on the phone wouldn't be useful.

I wasn't actively looking for the phone, it was just left out in the open. So the wheels in my head turned a little bit, and I wondered if it was possible to see if the other side had any plans. A very, very minor distraction. I didn't think it was possible to see deleted texts, but I figured if anybody knew how to do it, it would be the dads here.

Thanks for the responses.
"The general who wins the battle makes many calculations in his temple before the battle is fought. The general who loses makes but few calculations beforehand" - Sun Tzu
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby Regular Joe » Fri Mar 07, 2014 7:27 pm

What kind of phone is it?
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby BartSimpson » Fri Mar 07, 2014 7:51 pm

How would she know if you were successful or not?

You could always use it as a negotiation tactic - you know, ask her during the deposition if it is her phone?

Imply that . . . well, you know.
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby BubbaGumpShrimp » Sat Mar 08, 2014 4:39 pm

Navistar wrote:She doesnt really need a strategy because shes female. Worry about you


Yup. Even if she does have a "strategy"...it's entirely possible that it's an irrational one. It's too easy to get tunnel-vision/fixated on something like this. My advice would be to focus on your plan.
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby DivorcedDadInVa » Wed Jan 06, 2016 3:11 pm

Just as with a PC, deleting things on your phone doesn't erase them, it just removes them from the "master list" and marks the space as "available."

So, to the question of "are they there" the answer is "maybe." Typically, you'd send the phone to a computer forensics expert for analysis. People so this a lot, with varying success. How much the device is used after the deletion occurs plays a BIG part, and the chance of recovering things goes down exponentially for every hour the device is used AFTER the deletion.

If you REALLY think there is stuff on there, and you're in litigation, you can have your attorney issue a subpoena for the phone, and you can send it off - at your expense - for analysis.

Anything on there is likely admissible - even if she's discussing what her lawyer told her with third-parties. Only communications between the actual attorney and client are usually privileged.

Her new phone is fair game, too ... and if you can show she deleted ANYTHING that is relevant since litigation began, she can get into a lot of trouble for "spoliation" of evidence.

But, as others pointed out - is it worth it? My divorce was in a state that still has "at fault" divorces, so hunting for this sort of evidence was essential. I eventually got enough to "encourage" her to settle.
Last edited by DivorcedDadInVa on Wed Jan 06, 2016 3:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby Fatheroffour » Wed Jan 06, 2016 3:12 pm

Ha!
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Re: A Peek Into The Other Side's Plan ? Recovering Texts ?

Unread postby lionel2013 » Wed Jan 06, 2016 5:24 pm

George Roy wrote:Hello all,

Short version: Divorce. STBX had an affair.

Although STBX has been playing nice, it's been tough to figure out what her game plan may be at this point..

STBX recently upgraded to a new phone. And left the old one (out of service) sitting on the dresser.

Quite a few texts have been deleted (it's obvious based on the frequency of her usage).
There are a few still on there, but nothing incriminating.

A look at the other side's possible plans could be a serious game changer.

Is there a way to recover text messages from an out of service phone ?

Any input and suggestions are appreciated.


Unless you live in one of the (few) states where proving adultery has an effect on alimony and/or custody, even if you recovered them it would do you no good (and possibly, actually, would upset you).

So my suggestion is: move on, and think about your own plan.
Whenever you think divorce is bad, remember there are worse things than divorce.
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